I just wanted to post the Sedona Marriage Adventure event on this blog.
My good friend Joel Malm gave me the phrase “anti Conference” last September when I hiked Half Dome with he and a few other crazies.
He said, “an anti conference is smaller but more powerful way to get a message across because you are not in a big conference room with thousands of other people.”
I agree. We have all attended conferences and felt like we were just a number in a crowd… or as we sat in the ninth balcony we were not really involved or engaged in what was going on.
Connection Expeditions is totally opposite of the BIG conference and strives to be more personal and a whole lot more organic in its approach.
Connection Expeditions exist to give people another opportunity to grow both personally and collectively in a unique setting other than inside the walls of a church or conference center.
We believe that God gave us the outdoors to help us see the bigger picture He has designed for us.
Church settings are nice but the roof is to low. God took Abraham outside his tent and told him to look up at the stars in the sky – God told him that his offspring would outnumber the stars. What God did is just as significant as what he said. He led Abraham outside for an object lesson that he would never forget.
Why did God take him outside? Because inside the tent, Abraham’s vision of God and God’s amazing future for him was limited. He could not see the potential of God’s promises displayed against the backdrop of God’s creation. God wanted him to get a glimpse of just how big a God he was. Taking Abraham outside was God’s way of telling him not to put limits and ceilings on what God wanted to do through him and for him.
Conventional leadership, marriage conferences are neat to attend and meaningful without a doubt. They give us a new perspective on everyday life and work. But with the unique angle Connection Expeditions take we get out of buildings and into God’s creative natural sanctuary’s for lessons and connections that give us another way of learning what God is speaking to us.
In short, Connection Expeditions exists to create unique outdoor experiences that inspire vision and broaden
the perspective and connectivity of people of today.
Here is a brief look at the conference in Sedona this May 6,7 and 8 of 2012.
Sunday afternoon you arrive at Sedona’s Hilton resort and spa.
The event begins at 5:00 pm on the patio of the Hilton Resort and Spa and a brief mixer and introduction to our time together.
Monday and Tuesday we will explore the amazing sites of the region. - Connection Expeditions will use the geography and beauty of Sedona to teach couples from God’s creation the timeless truths that have kept couples together for thousands of years.
Then just before couples go to dinner we will teach on three tracks that will guide us through next few days.
THE CONFERENCE TRACKS
1. COMMUNICATION CONNECTS US
We will take a short walk into the distant past and see messages carved in stone by the Sinagua tribe some 900 years ago. Through this session we will see the significance of how important real and meaningful communication is between two people who desire to invest in a lifetime together.
#2. THE LOVE BRIDGE
Sedona offers some amazing natural scenic illustrations that can teach us how to adapt to and adjust to the challenges that attempt to keep us apart.
In this session, we will explore Sedona with the help of Jeep Tours on a 3 1/2 hour trip through the red rocks to Devil’s Bridge.
#3. CREATING ORDER IN THE NEST
One of the amazing gifts that this region offers is the ancient Native American ruins that still exist today. This session will be a trip back to some of the places and spaces people used to live hundreds of years ago.
We will see some biblical ways to create order in our homes that will have a lasting effect in our lives and the lives of our families for generations.
To register for this event, go to:
http://www.connectionexpedition.com/
Or feel free to email us or contact my cell @ 928-710-0750.
Please plan on registering early. This event is open to only 15 couples.
A $200.00 deposit per couple is due by march first to reserve you spot and room at the resort.
http://www.visitsedona.com/
http://www.hiltonsedonaresort.com/
http://www.connectionexpedition.com/
We are really looking forward to this time with you.
Steve and Brenda Lummer
I just wanted to start getting the word out about our 2012 Red Rocks Marriage Adventure Conference in Sedona, Arizona.
The event will base out of the Hilton Resort and Spa in beautiful scenic Sedona May 4th, 5th, and 6th.
http://www.hiltonsedonaresort.com/?page=home
This Couple’s Marriage Adventure Conference exists to:
1. Create unique active experiences that inspire married couples in connectivity.
2. Broaden couples perspective about their life together both in the short term and the long haul.
This spring’s Marriage Adventure Conference will be unique because of the setting and design of the three day event.
Sedona has been rated “Most Beautiful Place in America” by USA Weekend and we will make sure we are going to fit its beauty into our teaching sessions each day.
The Marriage Adventure Conference topics will include trips to unique historical and geographical locations, meaningful to our topic and theme of that day.
Here is a small glimpse of our three adventure sessions:
1. COMMUNICATION CONNECTS US
We will take a short walk into the distant past and see messages carved in stone by the Sinagua tribe some 900 years ago. Through this session we will see the significance of how important real and meaningful communication is between two people who desire to invest in a lifetime together.
2. THE LOVE BRIDGE
Sedona offers some amazing natural scenic illustrations that can teach us how to adapt to and adjust to the challenges that attempt to keep us apart.
In this session, we will explore Sedona with the help of Pink Jeep Tours on a 3 1/2 hour trip through the red rocks to Devil’s Bridge.
http://www.pinkjeep.com/
3. CREATING ORDER IN THE NEST
One of the amazing gifts that this region offers is the ancient Native American ruins that still exist today.
This session will be a trip back to some of the places and spaces people used to live hundreds of years ago.
We will see some biblical ways to create order in our homes that will have a lasting effect in our lives and the lives of our families for generations.
As well as some amazing outdoor expeditions, we will be blessed to have three sessions with Kent and Kristie Sexton of Phoenix First Assembly of God.
Kent and Kristie own a successful regional business as well as bringing a wealth of knowledge and wisdom to our Marriage Adventure Conference.
Registration will be available on the Marriage Adventure Conference web site that is coming soon.
Plan it now and you can join us then
Steve and Brenda Lummer
Marriage Adventures Conferences USA
Brenda and I are really excited about our Sedona, Arizona Marriage weekend next February 2012.
We are working with the Red Agave Resort in the scenic red rock country of Sedona.
http://www.redagaveresort.com/
This weekend will prove to NOT be just another marriage conference but a weekend adventure to build couples for a lifetime in all aspects of life together.
Start to plan a weekend with us a year from now …you won’t be disappointed.
Details and dates will be posted soon.
Steve and Brenda
Over the next eight weeks Brenda and I will be doing a teaching together called the Five Love Languages.
Sunday morning January 9th we will continue our sessions as well as take our love language assessment to let you know just what love language you have.
Dr. Gary Chapman, Christian counselor and author of The Five Love Languages writes about the importance of being able to express love to your spouse in a way that your spouse can understand. He calls this type of communicating using the five love languages.
Chapman’s Five Emotional Love Languages:
* Words of Affirmation
This is when you say how nice your spouse looks, or how great the dinner tasted. These words will also build your mate’s self image and confidence.
* Quality Time
Some spouses believe that being together, doing things together and focusing in on one another is the best way to show love. If this is your partner’s love language, turn off the TV now and then and give one another some undivided attention.
* Gifts
It is universal in human cultures to give gifts. They don’t have to be expensive to send a powerful message of love. Spouses who forget a birthday or anniversary or who never give gifts to someone who truly enjoys gift giving will find themselves with a spouse who feels neglected and unloved.
* Acts of Service
Discovering how you can best do something for your spouse will require time and creativity. These acts of service like vacuuming, hanging a bird feeder, planting a garden, etc., need to be done with joy in order to be perceived as a gift of love.
* Physical Touch
Sometimes just stroking your spouse’s back, holding hands, or a peck on the cheek will fulfill this need.
Really looking forward to the journey in this amazing study that will help us all communicate better with the people we love the most.
Pastor Steve
Over the next eight weeks Brenda and I will be doing a teaching together called the Five Love Languages.
Starting Wednesday night November 17th at 6:30 we will begin our first session as well as take our love language assessment to let you know just what love language you have.
Dr. Gary Chapman, Christian counselor and author of The Five Love Languages writes about the importance of being able to express love to your spouse in a way that your spouse can understand. He calls this type of communicating using the five love languages.
Chapman’s Five Emotional Love Languages:
* Words of Affirmation
This is when you say how nice your spouse looks, or how great the dinner tasted. These words will also build your mate’s self image and confidence.
* Quality Time
Some spouses believe that being together, doing things together and focusing in on one another is the best way to show love. If this is your partner’s love language, turn off the TV now and then and give one another some undivided attention.
* Gifts
It is universal in human cultures to give gifts. They don’t have to be expensive to send a powerful message of love. Spouses who forget a birthday or anniversary or who never give gifts to someone who truly enjoys gift giving will find themselves with a spouse who feels neglected and unloved.
* Acts of Service
Discovering how you can best do something for your spouse will require time and creativity. These acts of service like vacuuming, hanging a bird feeder, planting a garden, etc., need to be done with joy in order to be perceived as a gift of love.
* Physical Touch
Sometimes just stroking your spouse’s back, holding hands, or a peck on the cheek will fulfill this need.
Really looking forward to the journey in this amazing study that will help us all communicate better with the people we love the most.
Pastor Steve
Last Wednesday night we talked about the 4th in the series of Marriage Built To Last.
This past session was dealing with How to Diffuse Conflict.
Here is the acrostic we used.
D efine the problem alone together.
I nitiate a time to talk.
F ocus on the problem not the person.
F eel their pain.
U ncover the root problem.
S et things right between you – James 5:16
E stablish a game plan.
Just wanted to post these teaching outlines from our Pure Sex Series Brenda and did together a while ago – Stuff is too good to stay in a three ring binder.
OOPS…I DATED JECKYLL …BUT MARRIED HYDE
Pastor STEVE and BRENDA LUMMER
pure sex series
Duet. 22:9,10,11 Do not plant two kinds of seed in your vineyard; if you do, not only the crops you plant but also the fruit of the vineyard will be defiled. 10 Do not plow with an ox and a donkey yoked together.
11 Do not wear clothes of wool and linen woven together.
1. WHAT GOES WRONG?
Stages of Love:
1. ATTRACTION
2. INFATUATION
3. ATTACHMENT
Be careful what you get attached to
2. WHAT CHOICE DO I HAVE?
Some go… Some stay… Some find another way…
3. CREATING THE RIGHT MARRIAGE
Face your FAULTS COLLECTIVELY remember you are on the same TEAM.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me…” Psalm 139.23-24a
“Admit your faults to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” James, 5.16
Fulfill your SPOUSES NEEDS .
“The man should fulfill his duty as a husband and the woman should fulfill her duty as a wife. and each should satisfy the other’s needs.” 1 Corinthians 7.3
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29
Be UNDERSTANDING , not demanding.
“You husbands should try to understand the wife you live with…” 1 Peter 3.7
Enlist SUPPORT from others.
“Get all the advice and instruction you can.” Proverbs 19.20 (New Living Translation)
Get plugged into a GOD POWERED marriage.
Have you ever met someone that is so smart or opinionated you can’t get close to them?
Someone so brilliant or so set in THEIR way that not even God is allowed into their world?
I have a personal theory as to why some people cannot stay in a long term relationship.
It might be that selfishness is in the way of allowing others to be included… (Ya think?)
If we have no room for God in our lives, we most likely at some point will not allow anyone else in our lives either.
Here is a diagram that I drew on a napkin for someone once to help explain how every relationship we have here on earth has to be a “relationship triangle” or it won’t work. This applies to every relationship; husband & wife, boyfriend & girlfriend, parent & child, brother & sister, etc. No matter how hard you try to get close to each other, you will never get closer than the opposite sides of the wall that divides you. The only way to get truly close to each other is if each person in the relationship is focusing on their personal relationship with God. As you both grow closer to God, you will both grow closer to each other.
The closer each person is to God, the closer they get to each other.
The further away each person is from God the further away they get from each other.
God has a way of ridding us of selfishness and therefore we become more compassionate of the differences in the people we have in our lives.
A real smart guy said it this way. “My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.” –
- “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.”
- “I want to know God’s thoughts; the rest are details.”
Albert Einstein
Just sayin.
Steve
Filed under: marriage
What do you do to celebrate 30 years of marriage? – Of course, write a blog.
Actually Bren and I had a nice quit dinner at home out on the deck and then just enjoyed being home tonight.
I just wanted to post a few pics and then add a few comments about marriage and then end off the blog tonight with a prayer that worked.
In discussing marriage on his TV sitcom, Jerry Seinfeld tells his friend why he’s not married: “No healthy person would want the neglect I have to offer.” Let’s face it, even the best marriages are made up of two imperfect people who sometimes neglect each other. And when you’ve been hurt it’s easy to react in the flesh instead of responding in the Spirit. Some hurts go deep. At this point we must remember that
forgiveness is a decision, but trust is a process; when it’s been torn down, it takes time to rebuild. Men and women often perceive trust differently. When a woman’s been hurt, her husband may think an apology
should immediately enable her to trust him again, move on, and not talk about it. That’s not so; two things need to happen first:
1. The offending partner needs to acknowledge what they’ve done. Don’t just tell your mate to “get over it.” Validate their feelings, even though they act like they don’t want you to. Acknowledge their pain.
When others rationalize or trivialize what’s hurting us, it only makes us angrier. Only when we feel validated do our wounds begin to heal.
2.The offended partner needs to make sure that bitterness doesn’t creep in. “How can I do that?” you ask. By refusing to stay hurt any longer than is absolutely necessary, and by allowing God to heal your
heart and restore your love. The Bible says, “If you hear his voice today, don’t be stubborn” (Heb 4:7 CEV). When God gives you the grace to forgive and release the hurt, you need to seize it!
My grandfather performed part of our ceremony back on August 9th 1980. Fortunately we have a cassette tape of the words he prayed over our marriage and I have typed them out for a reminder that his prayer worked.
(click on the prayer pic to enlarge it)
What an amazing 30 years of partnership and love with an amazing woman. Bren makes my goal of ONE LIFE ONE WIFE very easy to attain. She is one of a kind and the world would be so much better off if we had more women around just like her.
I am very grateful for a life partner that is an example of excellence in so many ways.
I just wanted to post a” few” pics of our 30th wedding anniversary trip to Northern California.
We stayed in Truckee thanks to Roberto and Pam C.
Here is a brief look at our little get away trip.
Truckee is a little mountain town just north of Lake Tahoe.
We actually lived in that area back in the early 1980′s for a brief time.
We were youth pastor’s at Bethel Church in Grass Valley California for all of 16weeks. – (man that was a lesson).
The Yuba River is were we would go on our days off to swim and play. When Caleb was about 9 months old, Brenda would find gold dust in his diaper. Wow, that is when I started volunteering to change diapers.
My cousin Pam and her awesome husband Robert allowed us to stay in their cabin in Truckee. What a great place to relax and vegg.
Navada City is a classic Northern Cali Gold mining town.
Brenda and I loved riding the mountain bikes along the Truckee River….the beauty cannot be captured on a camera.
This is one of my favorite pics of my awesome wife.
If ever in Truckee you will not want to miss Jax Truckee Diner. – Great food all day long!
Emerald Bay on Lake Tahoe is breath taking to see. It is one of the main attractions when you go to Tahoe.
Yes, this is a nature not man made lake…..God does it better every time.
Now to the gift of the Truckee River .
This stream is THE tributary that flows out of Lake Tahoe.
63 tributary’s flow in and one flows out….The Truckee is amazing.
Rafting the Truckee is a “do over” for us next year…absolute blast.
Our 30 years of marriage has been an amazing journey. I am so fortunate to have a soul partner in Brenda…as you know, without Bren, I would be living in a van down by the river…..My parents modeled marriage for Brenda and I …They held the standard that we look up to..I think that is the way it should be.
My motto has become; “One life, one wife…make it great!”
