What do you do to celebrate 30 years of marriage? – Of course, write a blog.

Actually Bren and I had a nice quit dinner at home out on the deck and then just enjoyed being home tonight.

I just wanted to post a few pics and then add a few comments about marriage and then end off the blog tonight with a prayer that worked.

In discussing marriage on his TV sitcom, Jerry Seinfeld tells his friend why he’s not married: “No healthy person would want the neglect I have to offer.” Let’s face it, even the best marriages are made up of two imperfect people who sometimes neglect each other. And when you’ve been hurt it’s easy to react in the flesh instead of responding in the Spirit. Some hurts go deep. At this point we must remember that
forgiveness is a decision, but trust is a process; when it’s been torn down, it takes time to rebuild. Men and women often perceive trust differently. When a woman’s been hurt, her husband may think an apology
should immediately enable her to trust him again, move on, and not talk about it. That’s not so; two things need to happen first:

1. The offending partner needs to acknowledge what they’ve done. Don’t just tell your mate to “get over it.” Validate their feelings, even though they act like they don’t want you to. Acknowledge their pain.
When others rationalize or trivialize what’s hurting us, it only makes us angrier. Only when we feel validated do our wounds begin to heal.

2.The offended partner needs to make sure that bitterness doesn’t creep in. “How can I do that?” you ask. By refusing to stay hurt any longer than is absolutely necessary, and by allowing God to heal your
heart and restore your love. The Bible says, “If you hear his voice today, don’t be stubborn” (Heb 4:7 CEV). When God gives you the grace to forgive and release the hurt, you need to seize it!

My grandfather performed part of our ceremony back on August 9th 1980. Fortunately we have a cassette tape of the words he prayed over our marriage and I have typed them out for a reminder that his prayer worked.

(click on the prayer pic to enlarge it)

What an amazing 30 years of partnership and love with an amazing woman. Bren makes my goal of ONE LIFE ONE WIFE very easy to attain.  She is one of a kind and the world would be so much better off if we had  more women around just like her.

I am very grateful for a life partner that is an example of excellence in so many ways.



  1. Carrie Arnold says:

    Your marriage has, and will continue to be, an inspiration to so many. I know it is because God has been numero uno for 30 years but it is also testament to both of you choosing to listen to Him and follow through. Your marriage has been the MOST influential marriage for us. Your wisdom and teaching carried us through hard times and still speaks to us today.
    Please express the above to Brenda for me and know these words come Adam as well. And above all, Congratulations!

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